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Sweatin' buckets

by Heidi Hagen, former Cascade Yoga Studio teacher

I want to let you in on a little secret of mine. I want to fly (and I don’t mean on a 747)!

Okay, I will admit, I am completely mesmerized by the pelicans of southern California. There is just nothing like these magnificent birds in Michigan. Standing atop a cliff overlooking the thin strip of Pacific beach below, these amazing creatures float on by without so much as a flap or two of their expansive wings. And they’re right at eye level! It’s as if you could just reach out and touch them. They’re seriously that close! Every time I see them the same strong urge overcomes my usually rational mind and I think for a moment of just hopping on the back of one of these beauties and taking a ride down the coast. (Luckily the 100- foot drop off the side of the cliff brings me back to my senses quickly!) And when it’s feeding time, watch out little fishies! In a fraction of a second, a gracefully flying pelican can turn 90° and dive full speed straight toward the water below. With unbelievable control the bird keeps itself from crashing head first into the ocean. Only it’s beak breaks the surface and scoops up its dinner without even much of a splash!

That’s what I mean when I say I want to fly. I want to have that much control, that much grace and fluidity to move my body, mind, and soul like a synchronized trinity. And the awesome thing is I know it can be done. I’ve seen people, just regular folks, move with the awareness of a pelican (or any other wild animal) right on their mat across from me. Has it ever occurred to you that this may be why so many yoga poses are named after birds, beasts, and bugs?

I still remember the first time Tias Little gave a workshop at Cascade Yoga Studio. In his PowerPoint presentation he displayed a photograph of a bird of prey. He said that birds are masters of their bandhas, especially uddiyana bandha. The engagement of the abdominal lock is what allows birds to lift off and take flight. What can I say? The image stuck with me and like a true Midwestern girl, I’ve worked hard to engage my bandhas ever since then.

Evidence of my diligent, hard work came in a pool of sweat found on my mat after each practice. In fact, it became a standing joke to ask me if a storm blew into the studio and hovered over just my mat. Let’s just say that I worked too hard. Sweating is good, don’t get me wrong. Lots of factors can contribute to a healthy sweat, regardless of the amount of effort one puts out, such as the weather, body constitution, or the amount of water and toxins stored in the body. But I was losing gallons of water daily while the people around me barely perspired. My bandhas were getting stronger, no doubt about that, and I was feeling lighter too, but by the end of my practice I was exhausted.

Something had to change. So, I began with the physical. By taking out all the “prep” or extra poses I was doing, I shortened my practice by 15-30 minutes. I also relaxed my attitude regarding the pose. Instead of always working to get deeper, further, or more into the asana, I softened my approach. After giving myself a breath or two to get into the pose, I spent the next 1-2 breaths just being there before taking a breath to move out of it. My focused changed from getting somewhere else to being where I am!

It’s funny how things are so interconnected. During all these outward shifts I began to notice a change inwardly. For instance, my breath softened as my attitude relaxed. I wasn’t as tired and could maintain the engagement of my bandhas even longer - and I wasn’t sweating buckets! With my body at ease, my mind relaxed, too. It no longer jumped from thought to thought. I tied my attention to my bandhas, my breath and my gaze was able to rest at one spot for long uninterrupted periods of time. Sometimes I didn’t even know who practiced next to me until I rolled over at the end of savasana!

As I’ve moved my awareness from the gross to the more subtle aspects of my practice, I’ve begun to get a sense of how it feels to be a pelican flying gracefully along the California coast with bandhas engaged, breath even, and gaze focused. And man, it’s been quite a ride!